Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Pedestrian Perils

Since I spent a large chunk of the morning hiding behind my hair because I couldn’t keep my eyes open, I decided I better make a quick Starbucks run. (Now, spare me the Starbucks lecture—it’s only a block away from my office. Get off my back.)

So, granted, I’m a little sleepy, and granted, I was checking my voice mail, but I was still aware of my surroundings as I started to cross the street. I had the right-away. The little walking man was blinking at me as I stepped off the sidewalk. I’m almost halfway across the street when I am forced to jump backwards because a bus turning left was barreling around the corner, ready to run me over. (AM I INVISIBLE? I’m wearing a bright red shirt. What the eff.) Seriously, though, I had to leap out of the way. I didn’t think I was capable of leaping, but apparently when it’s a choice between death by bus and leaping, I’m a leaper.

My “ohmygodi’mgoingtodieonthestreet” thought process was abruptly terminated when I made eye contact with the bus driver as I leapt out of death’s way. She was glaring at me. Excuse me? You almost murdered me because you’re speeding around a corner, not paying attention to pedestrians crossing the street, and you’re glaring at ME?

I hate that bus driver. I have a sneaking suspicion that if she had actually run me over, she would have just kept driving.

I was so shaky, cranky, and irritated that not only did I almost die by bus on a Chicago street, I got a dirty look from my potential murderer, that when I reached Starbucks I went into panic mode and bought one of those giant chocolate cookies with my cappuccino.

I’m not hungry. I don’t want a cookie. I had French toast for breakfast. But considering I made it the whole block back to the office without being run over, and my $4 cappuccino was only half-full (seriously, Starbucks?), I deserve this cookie, dammit.

It might sound like I’m joking, or exaggerating slightly, but seriously, I almost died. My heart is still racing.

I’M AWAKE NOW! THANK YOU, BUS DRIVER!

2 comments:

  1. now - to be fair - a cappucino is SUPPOSED To be half foam. It's 1/4 espresso, 1/4 milk, and 1/4 air whipped milk.
    on the other hand WTF!? did you get her bus number? do you know what time it happened? Get that bitch written up or FIRED.
    I'm glad your okay. you do deserve cookies.

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  2. I think my cappuccino was 3/4 foam. ah well. that combined with my near death experience woke me up, so it's good.

    I wish I would have thought to look at the bus number, but I was just glad to be alive at the time. now i'm even more terrified to ride my bike in the city.

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